The Loss of My Beloved

I have lost my beloved. He passed away two days ago after a long, slow decline from multiple disease sources. We met when I was 20 and he was 30, we married a year later and have been together ever since. Like many couples, we have been through hell and happy times. He was the person I most trusted in the world. I knew he would be serious when I needed that and know he felt the same about me.

His love was bigger than both of us. His ability to love me and most everyone else, and especially his dogs, was a powerful and healing force. This morning I was thinking about how his human imperfections were less than his ability to love.

His daughter and I were talking this morning about him. Most people saw him as a cut-up, a joker, a man that wanted to bring smiles to your face and laughter to your day. But he was a loner, the most social loner either she and I have ever known. He worried about people, about work, about if I was happy, about his parents, about everything. His care for everyone was something he could not overcome, and so he worried. He wanted people to be okay, to be happy and safe. He was also intensely private and, as such, never discussed the health problems he was having. Most people would never have known until the last few years.

Ron and I met at a disco nightclub (it was the 70's) in Asheville, NC. A mutual friend of ours introduced us, and we basically fell head over heels in love. His first words to me, "I think I could fall in love with you." And we did. 

We moved to Florida, we moved to Illinois, we moved to Florida, and then finally to the mountains of east Tennessee. But he loved the beaches of Florida and the peace that only the ocean can bring. He will return there in the end. 

In the event you wish to make a donation, there are two local animal rescue organizations. In Mountain City, TN: http://www.rescuedogandendoflifesanctuary.org/donations.html and in Western North Carolina: Horse Helpers of the High Country: http://www.rescuedogandendoflifesanctuary.org/donations.html

Visitation and memorial service will be on Monday, November 7 at Mountain City Funeral Home, http://www.mountaincityfh.com/ , from 5 to 7 p.m.

 

93 comments

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Karen Scott Haggas

Such sad news to hear of your loss in November. I am so very sorry.

Binka

My dear friends bought me Prevailing Love for Christmas because the colors are so “me”. They subsequently found out you designed the set in honor of your husband and the love you had (have) for one another. I lost my husband, David, to ALS in April of this year. Laurie and Eveline’s gift of Prevailing Love was absolutely perfect but they didn’t even realize how perfect until they read your blog post. I am so sorry for your loss. I totally understand.

Kate

What a profound loss, Miss Babs! As someone who seeks love first among the four legged among us, I pray that you see Ron’s Love & generosity whenever you see a dog or horse you know he would love!

Sue

So sorry for your loss. He sounds like a great partner , he will always be in your heart .

Helena Wilson

Ron was a blessing for your life. Memories are priceless! xxx

Tess

Your memories shared of your beloved are beautiful and touching. Sending prayers to you for a heart healed by his love.

molly dybiec

I’m so sorry Miss Babs. I lost my dh 3 years ago but he is still in my heart and head. Talking to him, thinking about him, especially what would he do in a situation that I need help. The love stays with you and is a huge comfort. Praying all the best for you now and in the future.

Kristina

When I first read this entry some days ago I was moved very much – and in fact still am.
I feel very sorry for your loss and hope that it helps you to share the history of your love.

Deborah

I’m so sorry. Writing has always helped me share and cope with my laughter and my tears. You wrote an amazing tribute. I hope it helped you, because it helped me. Thank you for sharing. All the best. Hugs.

Austin

Ms. Babs, I’m sorry for your loss. What a moving tribute to your husband and life partner, Ron. You are in my thoughts and prayers.

Diana

So sorry for your loss, my thoughts and prayers are with you and family. This is a tough time of year. Take care of yourself

Chris40luv@gmail.com

My prayers are with you and your family. You were blessed to have found each other and to share such a love. XO

Lorna Oyarce

I am so sorry for the loss of your dear husband/life partner. What a beautiful tribute you give in writing about the love you two shared. Quite a testament to the maturing of love over time.
Thank you and all best wishes for grace and serenity to you and his daughter at this trying time.

Catherine

Beautiful tribute. A love so strong that endures forever and will carry you through until you’re together again in heaven. May God continue to bless you and your family during this time.

elenagraziela

What a beautiful tribute to your beloved husband. I am so very sorry for your loss. I have been widowed for over 4 years now, and I know there are no magic words to help. My heart hurts for you.

Your “Prevailing Love” gradient set has a special place in my heart. When I read the description, I was so moved. I volunteer for Soaring Spirits International, a support organization for widowed persons. I plan to use this set to make gifts for some of my fellow volunteers … and pass on your beautiful message of prevailing love. Thank you so much for sharing this with us.

Catena

So very sorry to hear of your loss. May his memory be eternal.

Becky G

Your story brings tears to my eyes and a small smile to my lips. Although I have not met him, I feel I have a real sense of him. Bless you and yours. Prayers for the repose of his soul.

Linda Brownlee

Such a romantic first sentence. May it give you comfort to feel all the ways he was there for you. This is a bummer. As I recall you slowed your pace to be with him this last year or more. Take good care of yourself. Look forward to seeing you again in a line holding your beautiful yarns. Thanks for giving us so much joy in your colors.

JoAnne

I am so sorry to read of your loss. Ron sounds like he was a wonderful man. I hope the memories you have of your time together will bring you comfort in the future.

Borie

Dear Miss Babs,

As I read your story, it really touched my heart. I am so sorry about your loss. I lost my husband 5 months ago, and my days without him are not getting better, and never will be the same. Our life goes on, we have to be strong.
Wishing you all the best, love, comfort in your life. If I can comfort you in any way, please send me a message.

Carlene Fairchild

I am so sorry to read about your recent loss. I also lost my first husband and though I have since remarried I still think about him and at times mentally talk to him. Even though they may be physically gone they never really leave.
May God bless you and your family in the coming months.

Dagmar

Dear Miss Babs, I’m so sorry to hear about your loss. I send you and your familiy my sincerest condolences. All the best, Dagmar

Amanda

Babs I am so sorry for your loss… the photos show a kind hearted man with a little twinkle in his eye! We miss our loved ones so much when they pass away… I have found ways to keep my loved one who died with me; I still talk to him when I take walks in nature, I light candles, sometimes I read a poem or special reading to him… oddly I still feel support from him like when I do something and think, “He would really like this”… I think that in different ways they are definitely still with us… that support and love is there and my hope is that its true, that they are there to meet us when its our turn to cross the threshold to the spiritual world…
Amanda

Dina Gaborko

I am so sorry for your loss.

Nancy Shomo

Oh dear lady I am so sorry to hear of your loss. My heart goes out to you. I am holding you in my heart and sending you love and much comfort. I am sincere in my wishes for comfort and peace for you and your daughter. I am sure his loving spirit will continue to surround you.Your work reflects the beauty of your soul and I am sure his love influenced that.I hope you find comfort in the creation of beautiful colors and find solace in the beauty of Nature that surrounds you. Much love, Nancy Shomo

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