2017 Year End - Musings

What a year! My whole world has changed and yet so much of it is the same. The loss of my husband just over a year ago, a new studio 5 months ago, the ongoing political turmoil, and travel to Germany and Netherlands have affected my life and its routines. Lots of change at home and at the studio. The same is the consistency of color and yarn in my world.

What have I learned or seen this year? One thing that has been reinforced for me is how intertwined lives are. When an action or reaction occurs to one person, it will also affect another and then another and then another. I think when I was younger, I would often consider it as "s**t rolling downhill" but I now just simply see it as the interconnection of us all - and no doubt it is the basis of our humanity. We simply are not in relationships alone, it takes the others around us to enlarge us and help us understand our lives as individuals. 

I spent a lot of the last number of years focused on Ron and making sure his needs were met. This year really has been about restarting relationships with family, friends, and the folks I work with on a daily basis. And doing this as Babs, not as Babs and Ron. Finding a path without Ron is an ongoing adventure, and some of it has been extremely difficult. Moving from being almost always a serious person these last few years, to a lighter being is the true goal. I am in the "mess of change," and it's ok, but it doesn't always feel pretty or elegant or sensible or ok, but it is.  (And sometimes, I am a little more emotional that I expect.)

Having yarn and color in my daily life means I have largely stayed sane through the year. As the color and yarn slip through my fingers and through my mind's eye, it has helped me when the sadness has wanted to overwhelm me. In truth, knitting and other handwork has been my saving grace through all my life, allowing me to settle down at the end of a long day and process what has happened or how I have felt. This is probably the truth for many of us who do handwork and it serves as a connecting thread for us who do this kind of "busywork".  I think of it as one more way for me to connect with others, for our lives to intertwine. May your new year amaze you in wonderful ways.

 

(Knitting socks in Solar Eclipse Hot Shot.)

12 comments

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Gail

It was very brave of you to open up and share your life and heart with the knitting community. I admire the courage that you show by going on with your life as painful and difficult as it has been for you. I wanted you to know that since my first project " On the Spice Market". I have LOVE your yarn. I rarely use any other. The feel of it is so amazing. Its my favorite! I wish you the very best in all aspects of your life as you move forward. I read in a biography of a man who tragically lost his best friend that it was the beauty of his wifes flower garden that helped him to heal. As you have said the art of making beautiful yarn and vibrant colors has helped you too. May it continue to be so for you. Sincerely.

Ginny

I am so sorry to hear of your painful loss – I understand how working with your craft is healing. Dealing with mind-numbing anxiety, I have found, through quilting and knitting, that focusing on creating something, lifts a weight off my shoulders. I love it – creating unique pieces for my beautiful children and grandchildren, brings me an inexplicable joy that helps me through some difficult times. I just discovered your website and have spent a joyous evening looking at every page of beautiful yarns – it made my heart beat faster to see such amazing colour combinations. I can’t wait to create something special for someone special – thank you for sharing your talent with all of us!

Anne

Babs,
I was sad to hear of your loss. You are such a strong creative person, and i know yarns and knitting shall give you some solace. I shall look forward to seeing you at Stitches in a few weeks. Currently, I am knitting a sweater that is half “Isadora” yarn, which I purchased a few years ago for another project, but it was too fine. (Yummy2 worked for that one.) Take care.
Anne

Stacy Scalzi

babs, i am so very sorry for your loss. i to have felt that feeling that no person really gets, until they loose someone they love. i lost my beloved husband also. it has been five years now, it seems like yesterday. i think of him still everyday. thank god for those real people that helped me while i healed abit. and i learned knitting again! the knitting comunity cannotbe beat with the love they show to one another. love and prayers for a great new year, and you are so right, we are all connected, and very important to oneanother. stacy

Joyce Correia

I’ve just completed my third back surgery in three years. As I have worked through rehab and strengthening, my knitting bag has been nearby. Knitting has been a comfort and relief throughout. Plus it’s great fun.

Virginia E

Thank You Babs for sharing your story, it is truly touching.
I’m Thankful that your incredibly beautiful yarn has brought you through. I can’t speak for every knitter and crocher, but it is a certain place of sanity, creativity, passion, love, peace, and beauty for me, I have hope that the world has blessing and beauty as I create a gift for someone special in my life, the joy is immeasurable when you see their face.
Thankful for your creativity, your hands are blessed and bring great blessings to others! Thanks you so much.

Jodie

This is my first time to your page….I love you already and I don’t even know you! I am newish to knitting, and am a scrap Booker so I get the color combinatios, and pattern. I have been becoming in love with yarn and gathering many a skein lately from some hand dryers in my local area here. Your words are joyful to me, and resonate deeply within my soul, I’m happy to have found you, thank you so much!

Connie G

Another beautiful expression of your feelings that so many of us can relate to. Thank you for being who you are and who you are becoming.

Regina

I understand your loss and the void it creates. Knitting, prayer and my Goldie were my companions during some dark nights. Don’t know how I could have done it without them. {{Hugs}}
Much love in the new year!

Vickie

Lots of love, Babs. You remain one of my favorite people in the world. ?

Carol High

“Having yarn and color in my daily life means I have largely stayed sane through the year. As the color and yarn slip through my fingers and through my mind’s eye, it has helped me when the sadness has wanted to overwhelm me."

It’s the same for me too. My favorite knitting chair with my bag by its side is my refuge more days than not. Another of my great pleasures is to log into your web page and create yarn sets in all sorts of combos, just to see the colors interact in different ways lifts my spirits. You are an inspiration to so many, Miss Babs. Bless you!!

Jane

I lost my husband 30 years ago. It’s a club that you never want to be a member of. I still think of him everyday. I learned there’s truth to the myth that the Phoenix rises stronger than before.

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